Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Getting nervous

Hey everyone!
Thanks for the comments and e-mails!
I have to say I am getting nervous about this surgery. I don't feel sick, and I'm not in any pain, yet I have to go and get my colon resectioned! Weird! When I get to the hospital Friday, I'm going to tell them to get me on some drugs ASAP. Something to help me relax :-).
The last few days were very normal, and at times I could forget that I have cancer. But then, of course, something would remind me. I went to see my primary care doc for my pre-op, and that even made me nervous--just another step closer to making this surgery a reality. She (my doc) said she was surprised when she saw the results of the colonoscopy. She was very kind. I asked her if I was doing the right thing, because everything has happened so fast I haven't really thought about if there are other options. She definitely felt I was doing what I should. She said the time I might want a second opinion is after surgery, when we are deciding on a treatment plan. It was comforting to have her opinion. All decisions have been made for me, and I wanted to make sure I wasn't missing something.
Sunday I went to church for the first time since this has all happened. I was nervous about going because I knew I would cry. I often get tears during worship anyway, and this time was much worse. The awesomeness (sp?) of God is just overwhelming. I know He loves me and cares for me. After service I went up for prayer and Pastor Tom annointed my head with oil and prayed for me. I felt soooooo much better afterward. It was worth the tears! I felt God's peace so strongly! All I really need from God is to feel His presence and know He's there. I can handle anything if I know that. Wed. Rich and I are going to church during their staff meeting to have them all pray for us--like the verse James 5:14 says. Thank you to all the people at Bridgewood! What a wonderful church!
So now I want to put in a plug for Facebook! Any COUSINS of mine reading this should start a facebook and search for my name and "friend" me. I've been wanting to start a group where we can post pics and keep in touch, and I think facebook is the best way cuz its private, easy, and alot of people have them anyway now.
So that's my update for now. I'm off to work soon--only 2 days left, then I'm off for about 6 weeks.
Love ya all!!

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