Well, I've been putting off updating, because so much has happened since March (I can't believe it's been that long!) that this could be a REALLY long post. I'll do my best to shorten all the news, and hopefully update more often!
Let's start with my health~thankfully not much has changed! I still have the Seton thingy in my fistula, and it's feeling a bit better (although sore now from sitting so long!). I recently had an ultrasound of the area, but I can't get in to see my surgeon again until Aug 7th to find out the results and what we do next. Remember, this was caused by the radiation I had for colon cancer, and the radiated skin makes this a bit more tricky. For now, we wait and see what the surgeon says. She is really good, and I trust her judgement.
In May I had my 3 month check up with my oncologist and had my labs done. Everything looks good--some things, like hemoglobin and platelets, have improved. I continue to have problems with neuropathy, esp. in my feet, I continue to be tired a lot, and I still have a lot of bowel issues from my Low Anterior Resection. But I'm happy to be here, and be alive! My surgery was over 3 years ago--can you believe it?!
In Aug. I'll have labs, CT scans, MRI, and see my onc. again. I had an MRI and Mammogram in Feb., but he wants to start staggering them and doing one of them every 6 months. So, I'll have the MRI in Aug., and the mammo next Feb. My oncologist is keeping a close eye on me, so if there ever is a recurrence, of either cancer, we'll catch it early!
Ok, on to other news! In my last post I wrote about Rich going to a job interview that sounded promising--well he got that job! The pay is BETTER, the people are nice, and the job is interesting, rewarding, and less stressful! The drive is about 24 miles one way (nearly double what he drove before), but it's not so bad. He leaves early to beat the worst of the rush, and he is trying different routes. What we thought might be a major trial, was God just answering my many prayers to get Rich a better job! We have an AMAZING God (and He is amazing whether or not we go through difficult times!). Rich was miserable at the other place the last few years. Life is too short to live like that!
I have not found another job, and am thinking my little part time job at the school is really a blessing. Although it doesn't bring in much money (enough for a car payment or 2), I get to spend more time with my girls and grandkids. And those 3.25 hours a day I do work wear me out, so longer hours would be worse! I still keep my eyes open for a quieter paperwork kind of job though. That wouldn't wear me out as much as working with kids does. But then I wouldn't have summers off, would I?
Now for the REALLY GOOD news! Alyssa is pregnant!! And she is having a GIRL! I am sooooo excited! I was really hoping for a girl, because we've got the 2 boys. Alyssa was hoping for a girl too, because she LOVES pink! She warned Jaren that there might be 'pink overload'. He is so good to her. It makes him happy just to see her so happy about the baby. Funny thing is, this wasn't planned, and they had actually just talked about putting off having kids for a long time. God had other plans for them! They will be great parents, and they will have lots of help! Baby girl is due Nov. 5th.
Brennan and Charlie are growing like little weeds! Charlie is walking with a walker, and can walk holding on to furniture. He is so awesome. He is happy, giggly, and loves to hug and be held! He'll soon be 5! Brennan will be 3 the end of Sept. He is so funny and has a great sense of humor. Talks and sings all the time.
Alyssa and Jaren bought a house only 4 miles away. They moved in mid-May. Rachel and Ken sold their house in just a few days, and bought a house a little farther away. They are about 25 min. away, instead of 5, but are a little closer to Ken's work. Rachel is always planning and thinking about the next child they will adopt, but for now, there is work to be done on their new house, and 2 adorable little boys to give lots of attention to!
Shonna did move back home and we are so happy to have her back in MN! She will be going to the the U of M! Not the school I ever expected, but it is a lot less expensive than the Christian schools (even with some good scholarships she got!). She adopted 2 cute bunnies, and they are taking up most of my family room! But I love rodents, and these 2 are cute and have a lot of personality! Shonna will eventually be going to live down the street with my sister.
Ok, how did I do? Not too long I hope! I plan to do a post soon on some of the emotions and issues we cancer survivors can have. I've experienced a lot of highs and lows lately. But that's for another day....
May God greatly bless each reader that stops by here...love to all!
Tina
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Friday, December 23, 2011
Merry Christmas!!
Just wanted to say "MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!"
I hope everyone is able to spend some time with their loved ones, and enjoy the sights and sounds of the holiday season. I'm praying for anyone that might read this who isn't looking forward to Christmas and is sad and/or lonely. May God give you a miracle as we celebrate the birth of His son. May He comfort you and give you the peace that only He can give. May you feel his arms around you and feel safe and loved beyond your wildest imagination. Accept the gift of His Son, Jesus, and you'll have a new home (Heaven) and a new family (the body of Christ)!
I'm posting some recent pictures of my family. The one with all of us is on Thanksgiving (2011), the one where Rich is giving me a foot rub I included because this shows how I sometimes have to deal with the neuropathy in my feet! Rich's foot rubs really help! The other 2 were taken 12-18-11 on Charlie's Dedication day ( at our church we dedicate babies to the Lord, and they can choose to be baptized when they are older).
Love and blessings!
Tina
I hope everyone is able to spend some time with their loved ones, and enjoy the sights and sounds of the holiday season. I'm praying for anyone that might read this who isn't looking forward to Christmas and is sad and/or lonely. May God give you a miracle as we celebrate the birth of His son. May He comfort you and give you the peace that only He can give. May you feel his arms around you and feel safe and loved beyond your wildest imagination. Accept the gift of His Son, Jesus, and you'll have a new home (Heaven) and a new family (the body of Christ)!
I'm posting some recent pictures of my family. The one with all of us is on Thanksgiving (2011), the one where Rich is giving me a foot rub I included because this shows how I sometimes have to deal with the neuropathy in my feet! Rich's foot rubs really help! The other 2 were taken 12-18-11 on Charlie's Dedication day ( at our church we dedicate babies to the Lord, and they can choose to be baptized when they are older).
Love and blessings!
Tina
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Life Lately
I often think of things I should blog about, and even "write" posts in my head, but sometimes I have a hard time putting it all down for others to read. My chemo brain definitely makes coming up with words more difficult!
There has been a lot of "cancer" thoughts lately. Not because of anything going on with me, but because of people around me. There is a lady at church that just found out she has uterine cancer. She won't know the details until after she has surgery next week. It may be a rare, aggressive form of cancer. I knew her face, and had heard the name, but finally met her on Sunday and put the two together. I hope I can be of some help to her. Then there is a young (19!) friend of our family who may have melanoma. It's almost impossible to think of her with cancer! The latest test showed it may be precancerous, but it is being sent for more testing. I'm thankful that both of these people are strong Christians; I know their faith will help them get through whatever life throws at them.
Then there are the people I know through blogs. One lady, Ann, finds out today if her bc has spread to her liver. (Sadly, it did. Stupid cancer! Hugs and prayers being sent!!)) Another's husband is still fighting colon cancer after 6 years! There have been recent deaths of people who's blogs I have read. (This is especially hard for me). It seems cancer is never very far from my thoughts! I have a long list of people I pray for. I know many of you also know people with cancer--it seems to affect us all in one way or another. Keep praying for a cure!!
Speaking of "slogans", there is much discussion about breast cancer slogans and such. And even among those that have had breast cancer, there is a variety of opinions. I, personally, do not like such campaigns as "I Heart Boobies", and "Save the Tatas". I think my LIFE is more important than my BREASTS. I think these campaigns are demeaning, and, really, quite ridiculous. We all know teenage boys are wearing "I heart Boobies" bracelets because they like the word, more than they want to save anyone's life. I'm sure there are a few out there that know someone personally with cancer, and they wear the bracelets to show support--but that is not the majority. Of course, there are bc survivors that like to get attention of any kind on bc, and I respect their opinions. We all feel differently. Having had colon cancer also, I sure would like to see more attention/awareness brought to that. Colons are not sexy, but having yours checked may save your life! To me, saying "Get Your Butt Checked" is not demeaning to anyone. It might raise awareness, which colon cancer needs more than breast cancer (BOTH need cures!!). I think I'll stop there...that's just my 2 cents. I always appreciate and respect other's opinions.
While all these thoughts and discussions make me sad, I am thankful I don't worry about cancer returning. That is a fear that God has taken away from me. I rarely think about it, and if I do think about it, it is without any fear. Wow, God has brought me through so much. I am blessed by His refining of me!
Aside from the sadness I sometimes feel, I am very happy overall. I am babysitting less, so I have more time to do the things I have been wanting to. Like organizing, getting out to lunch with friends, doing things with the girls, volunteering at church. And then there are some days, like today, I just really don't know what to do with myself! Do I start a project? Watch a movie? Read? Exercise (yeah, right!)? So many of my projects need my husband's help--and that might never happen! Maybe I should just start digging in by myself and see what happens! :0) Oh-- and about the babysitting less--I still get to watch the boys about once a week, but Charlie hasn't had too many appointments lately, so Rachel hasn't needed me for Brennan very often. I love watching them, but am glad for some "me" time. I have waited a long time to feel well and have some time to myself! That sounds so selfish, but hopefully you all understand. And I am trying to use some of my "me" time to help others too! Soon, Charlie will start physical therapy 2 days a week, and I will have Brennan those afternoons, and I look forward to that time with him!
I plan on going back to work in the fall, when school starts. Some days I'm excited about going back, and other days I dread it. But I cut my hours to only 3 a day, so that shouldn't be too bad. Then I will still be available to help Rachel in the afternoons, if she needs me. I'm so blessed to be able to cut my hours. Sometimes I feel guilty because my husband works so hard for our family. But his working also helps his daughter and grandsons, because then I can work less and help them out! I figure I'll eventually have to work more--maybe if I do we can retire earlier. I want Rich to be able to enjoy life too--and not just work all the time!
Take care everyone! And may God bless each and everyone of you! Prayers are being sent up for whatever your needs are--I may not know, but God does :)
Love,
Tina
There has been a lot of "cancer" thoughts lately. Not because of anything going on with me, but because of people around me. There is a lady at church that just found out she has uterine cancer. She won't know the details until after she has surgery next week. It may be a rare, aggressive form of cancer. I knew her face, and had heard the name, but finally met her on Sunday and put the two together. I hope I can be of some help to her. Then there is a young (19!) friend of our family who may have melanoma. It's almost impossible to think of her with cancer! The latest test showed it may be precancerous, but it is being sent for more testing. I'm thankful that both of these people are strong Christians; I know their faith will help them get through whatever life throws at them.
Then there are the people I know through blogs. One lady, Ann, finds out today if her bc has spread to her liver. (Sadly, it did. Stupid cancer! Hugs and prayers being sent!!)) Another's husband is still fighting colon cancer after 6 years! There have been recent deaths of people who's blogs I have read. (This is especially hard for me). It seems cancer is never very far from my thoughts! I have a long list of people I pray for. I know many of you also know people with cancer--it seems to affect us all in one way or another. Keep praying for a cure!!
Speaking of "slogans", there is much discussion about breast cancer slogans and such. And even among those that have had breast cancer, there is a variety of opinions. I, personally, do not like such campaigns as "I Heart Boobies", and "Save the Tatas". I think my LIFE is more important than my BREASTS. I think these campaigns are demeaning, and, really, quite ridiculous. We all know teenage boys are wearing "I heart Boobies" bracelets because they like the word, more than they want to save anyone's life. I'm sure there are a few out there that know someone personally with cancer, and they wear the bracelets to show support--but that is not the majority. Of course, there are bc survivors that like to get attention of any kind on bc, and I respect their opinions. We all feel differently. Having had colon cancer also, I sure would like to see more attention/awareness brought to that. Colons are not sexy, but having yours checked may save your life! To me, saying "Get Your Butt Checked" is not demeaning to anyone. It might raise awareness, which colon cancer needs more than breast cancer (BOTH need cures!!). I think I'll stop there...that's just my 2 cents. I always appreciate and respect other's opinions.
While all these thoughts and discussions make me sad, I am thankful I don't worry about cancer returning. That is a fear that God has taken away from me. I rarely think about it, and if I do think about it, it is without any fear. Wow, God has brought me through so much. I am blessed by His refining of me!
Aside from the sadness I sometimes feel, I am very happy overall. I am babysitting less, so I have more time to do the things I have been wanting to. Like organizing, getting out to lunch with friends, doing things with the girls, volunteering at church. And then there are some days, like today, I just really don't know what to do with myself! Do I start a project? Watch a movie? Read? Exercise (yeah, right!)? So many of my projects need my husband's help--and that might never happen! Maybe I should just start digging in by myself and see what happens! :0) Oh-- and about the babysitting less--I still get to watch the boys about once a week, but Charlie hasn't had too many appointments lately, so Rachel hasn't needed me for Brennan very often. I love watching them, but am glad for some "me" time. I have waited a long time to feel well and have some time to myself! That sounds so selfish, but hopefully you all understand. And I am trying to use some of my "me" time to help others too! Soon, Charlie will start physical therapy 2 days a week, and I will have Brennan those afternoons, and I look forward to that time with him!
I plan on going back to work in the fall, when school starts. Some days I'm excited about going back, and other days I dread it. But I cut my hours to only 3 a day, so that shouldn't be too bad. Then I will still be available to help Rachel in the afternoons, if she needs me. I'm so blessed to be able to cut my hours. Sometimes I feel guilty because my husband works so hard for our family. But his working also helps his daughter and grandsons, because then I can work less and help them out! I figure I'll eventually have to work more--maybe if I do we can retire earlier. I want Rich to be able to enjoy life too--and not just work all the time!
Take care everyone! And may God bless each and everyone of you! Prayers are being sent up for whatever your needs are--I may not know, but God does :)
Love,
Tina
Sunday, April 17, 2011
My New Grandson
Charles Gabriel Andreev ( those are his 2 middle names) is home with his mommy and daddy, finally! Rachel, Shonna and Charlie got home late Thurs. night, after a very long day of travel. We met Charlie Sat. morning, and then went back after naps in the afternoon and brought my mom with too. He is just a little sweetie! He LOVES his momma! Brennan has been really good with him right from the start--I'm so amazed! I've been praying for a long time that God would prepare his heart for his new brother, and to give him a compassionate heart like his mother has. When we were over Sat., Charlie was playing with a ball; he would grab it and drop it on the floor, over and over. Eventually Brennan started picking it up and giving it back to Charlie each time. What a helpful little brother!! Today Rachel got them both ready and brought them to church! Lots of people wanted to meet him.
Someone asked me if this is the same boy that is on the picture on my blog ("Joshua"), and the answer is yes. Joshua is the name given to him by the ministry (Reece's Rainbow) that helps these kids get adopted. They can't use the child's real name, so they give them each a different name. Rachel considered keeping the name Joshua, but she and her husband finally decided on Charlie.
Charlie has a long road ahead of him. He sees a cardiologist on Monday, and they'll go from there. He also needs to see an ENT, an opthamologist, and a nutritionist. He'll need heart surgery, and after that physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, and whatever else to get him moving and growing!! He is so tiny. He's 3.5 years old, but only as long as Brennan (and B is short for 18 months). And he's 10 pounds lighter than Brennan!
Shonna left after lunch today to go back to school in KC. It was hard for her to leave because she will miss her nephews so much. I assured her the next 4 weeks will go by fast, then she'll be done with school, and be able to come home for awhile. I loved having all 3 of my girls (and 2 grandsons!) in church today. My mom went with us too, so that was really nice!
Speaking of my girls, someone at church commented on what nice daughters we have and what a lovely family we are. I've gotten that comment before, and every time I say it's all God. My family is truly a miracle. I don't think people fully believe me when I say that, but I really mean it. Rich and I have always loved our girls, but there were times when our family nearly broke apart, and just some really bad times. Through it all, I just kept praying for my family and my girls, and asked God to protect them from the mess we were in. God has been faithful and answered my prayers for a great marriage, and children that believe in Him and follow His ways. We certainly went through the fire to get here, but that's what makes it such a miracle! God's Word says believers will go through trials, but He will be with us through it all, and great will our reward be. "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." James 1:12 Well, I could write a lot about trials, and post a lot of Bible verses, because I've had my shares of problems. For some more good verses, click on the "Bible Verses" tab at the top.
Oh--I wanted to mention that I had my MRI and mammogram on Thursday. I haven't heard anything, other than the radiologist looked at my mammo before I left and didn't see anything that needed extra attention at that time. If there was something on the MRI, I probably would have been called already to come in for more pictures, so no news should be good news. The MRI was for the breast cancer. I had a CT in Feb. for the colon cancer and that was clear, so I should be able to say I'm NED (No Evidence of Disease) soon!
I hope and pray that all my readers have a blessed Easter, and rejoice in the salvation we can now have through Christ's death and resurrection!
Love,
Tina
Someone asked me if this is the same boy that is on the picture on my blog ("Joshua"), and the answer is yes. Joshua is the name given to him by the ministry (Reece's Rainbow) that helps these kids get adopted. They can't use the child's real name, so they give them each a different name. Rachel considered keeping the name Joshua, but she and her husband finally decided on Charlie.
Charlie has a long road ahead of him. He sees a cardiologist on Monday, and they'll go from there. He also needs to see an ENT, an opthamologist, and a nutritionist. He'll need heart surgery, and after that physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, and whatever else to get him moving and growing!! He is so tiny. He's 3.5 years old, but only as long as Brennan (and B is short for 18 months). And he's 10 pounds lighter than Brennan!
Shonna left after lunch today to go back to school in KC. It was hard for her to leave because she will miss her nephews so much. I assured her the next 4 weeks will go by fast, then she'll be done with school, and be able to come home for awhile. I loved having all 3 of my girls (and 2 grandsons!) in church today. My mom went with us too, so that was really nice!
Speaking of my girls, someone at church commented on what nice daughters we have and what a lovely family we are. I've gotten that comment before, and every time I say it's all God. My family is truly a miracle. I don't think people fully believe me when I say that, but I really mean it. Rich and I have always loved our girls, but there were times when our family nearly broke apart, and just some really bad times. Through it all, I just kept praying for my family and my girls, and asked God to protect them from the mess we were in. God has been faithful and answered my prayers for a great marriage, and children that believe in Him and follow His ways. We certainly went through the fire to get here, but that's what makes it such a miracle! God's Word says believers will go through trials, but He will be with us through it all, and great will our reward be. "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." James 1:12 Well, I could write a lot about trials, and post a lot of Bible verses, because I've had my shares of problems. For some more good verses, click on the "Bible Verses" tab at the top.
Oh--I wanted to mention that I had my MRI and mammogram on Thursday. I haven't heard anything, other than the radiologist looked at my mammo before I left and didn't see anything that needed extra attention at that time. If there was something on the MRI, I probably would have been called already to come in for more pictures, so no news should be good news. The MRI was for the breast cancer. I had a CT in Feb. for the colon cancer and that was clear, so I should be able to say I'm NED (No Evidence of Disease) soon!
I hope and pray that all my readers have a blessed Easter, and rejoice in the salvation we can now have through Christ's death and resurrection!
Love,
Tina
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Having Fun With My Grandson!
Some more pictures! The top 2 are Charlie, and the bottom is Brennan (he LOVES playing in the laundry basket!)
Brennan is still with us. He went to his other grandparents' house again this weekend, and we got him back after church. He didn't look too excited to see me at first (but he wasn't sad either), but after church he walked up to me and hugged my legs and when I picked him up I got more hugs! I'm convinced there isn't a sweeter boy on this planet! He's also very blessed to have 2 sets of grandparents that love him to pieces and spoil him! In the carseat on the way home he was "talking" to himself and giggling. We ate lunch and then it was nap time. He has been going down for his naps and bedtime really well. He used to fuss a bit at first, but now he just lays right down and smiles at me. I'm getting strong "mom" arms again from carrying him. The other day my arms were sore because I was holding him upside down (he loves that!) and he wanted to do it over and over! Grandpa is having fun playing with him after work, and he gets hugs too!
Rachel and Ken will be home late Wed. night. They will come over Thurs. morning to get Brennan. It'll be interesting to see his reaction. I think they will get lots of hugs! He might be a little mad at them later though, you just never know how kids react--I've heard lots of different stories from people. We have been skyping every day with Rachel and Ken, and I think that has been a good thing for Brennan.
Next Friday (April 1st) will be 1 year since I found out that I did have breast cancer. I will have some tests done April 14th and then I should be declared cancer free, or NED (No Evidence of Disease). I don't think I will be able to say "cured" though. I'm actually not sure of all the details on that--at what point I can say cured. I thought my onc said at the beginning of the breast cancer that we can cure it at this stage (2b), but that might have been before we knew it was 2b. I'll have to ask him, but I don't see him for a long time. Maybe my nurses will know. I'll ask when I get my next Herceptin infusion (April 6th).
I believe I am cured though. God has given me such peace about all of this. I haven't been nervous AT ALL for any of my tests, or anytime I have to go to the cancer center. That is something only God could do, because I used to get nauseated every time I went, and tests would make me nervous about what they might find. I'm always amazed at how freeing being a believer is. With Jesus, I have the Truth, and it has set me free! (John 8:32) I don't need to fear anything, because God is with me always! I am still human, though, and imperfect, so there may be times when fear creeps up on me. If that happens I will get out my Bible and read God's promises to me!
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
Have a great week!
Blessings!
Tina
Monday, February 21, 2011
CT and MUGA Today
I had my 6 month CT scan and my 6 week MUGA scan today. The MUGA was first--at 10 am.(Rich drove me in the truck because the roads were bad from over a foot of snow! He's my hero!) The nurse accessed my port, then withdrew some blood. They have to call for an RN to do the port--the tech can draw blood from veins, but not the port. They mix the blood with a tracer (nuclear stuff), let it set for 20 minutes to combine, then put it back in me. For the scan I lay on a flat, narrow table and a machine moves over me and stays in one place for 10 minutes, then it moves closer and stays there for another 10 minutes, then it's done! Very easy! Well, unless you have a painful shoulder, like I do! My left shoulder has been bothering me since my mastectomy. It is getting worse. For the first of the 2 scans I had to have my left arm above my head for the whole 10 min. It hurt so bad. I'm glad the tech left, because if he had been in there I would have told him to stop the scan. I could hardly stand it--my whole body was screaming out for me to move my arm. I was praying and praying and thankfully the time did seem to go faster. The 2nd 10 min. scan I was able to keep my arms down--and that scan seemed to take forever. But I didn't mind--I was happy to just rest there after the pain I had just endured!
When that was done I went back to the imaging waiting room for the CT scan. I had to drink 4 cups of that awful berry flavored chalk. I remember thinking this stuff wasn't so bad (I've heard of people throwing up from it!), but this time it made me gag. The other flavor was banana, but I hate banana flavored stuff. After an hour of drinking that it was time for the scan. The scan itself is very quick; I think I was only gone for 15 minutes. At the end of the scan they inject me with some "contrast". The contrast is different somehow from the stuff you have to drink, and helps them see different things on the scan. I have what's called a power port, or smart port, so the contrast can go right in through the port. If you don't have one of these, then they put it in through an IV. Another reason I love my port! Anyway, sometimes at the end of the scan I get this intense nausea that only lasts about 5 minutes, but feels awful! I told the tech that so she could run the contrast in slower. That seems to help, as I did not get the nausea this time.
After my tests were done, Rich and I went to eat at a Chinese buffet. I was very hungry, but my stomach was starting to gurgle, and I wanted to get home, so we didn't stay too long. I forgot how that stuff affects my guts. Let's just say there has been much gurgling and frequent bathroom trips! Right now I just feel sort of wiped out, have a headache, and my stomach still doesn't feel to great. If it doesn't get better before bed I may just sleep in the recliner. That is my favorite place to be when my stomach bothers me (which happens quite a bit since my colon resection!). It also helps Rich sleep--he gets up so early, and doesn't sleep well the way it is, and I don't want to be bothering him all night.
So, about 3 hours after the ct was done, I got a call from my oncologist's nurse, Carol. She said Dr. J has seen the scan results and wanted me to know everything looked clear! So, good news!! I still have that mammo and mri to get through in April, then I will be really excited!
I really had no "scanxiety" this time. I kept waiting for it, assuming it would hit, but it never did. I am so thankful to God for giving me peace! He took away my fears, and took away the nausea that I used to get everytime I was on my way to Regions Hospital. Yes, He allowed me to go through 2 cancer diagnoses, but He has been right by my side through it all. I have learned so much about my Lord, and that's what really matters. As I like to say---it's not about me, it's all about GOD!
I'll check back in a few days, after meeting with my wonderful Dr. Jahagirdar!
Please say a prayer for my cousin Jim, as he lost his wife unexpectedly this weekend--very sad!
Tina
When that was done I went back to the imaging waiting room for the CT scan. I had to drink 4 cups of that awful berry flavored chalk. I remember thinking this stuff wasn't so bad (I've heard of people throwing up from it!), but this time it made me gag. The other flavor was banana, but I hate banana flavored stuff. After an hour of drinking that it was time for the scan. The scan itself is very quick; I think I was only gone for 15 minutes. At the end of the scan they inject me with some "contrast". The contrast is different somehow from the stuff you have to drink, and helps them see different things on the scan. I have what's called a power port, or smart port, so the contrast can go right in through the port. If you don't have one of these, then they put it in through an IV. Another reason I love my port! Anyway, sometimes at the end of the scan I get this intense nausea that only lasts about 5 minutes, but feels awful! I told the tech that so she could run the contrast in slower. That seems to help, as I did not get the nausea this time.
After my tests were done, Rich and I went to eat at a Chinese buffet. I was very hungry, but my stomach was starting to gurgle, and I wanted to get home, so we didn't stay too long. I forgot how that stuff affects my guts. Let's just say there has been much gurgling and frequent bathroom trips! Right now I just feel sort of wiped out, have a headache, and my stomach still doesn't feel to great. If it doesn't get better before bed I may just sleep in the recliner. That is my favorite place to be when my stomach bothers me (which happens quite a bit since my colon resection!). It also helps Rich sleep--he gets up so early, and doesn't sleep well the way it is, and I don't want to be bothering him all night.
So, about 3 hours after the ct was done, I got a call from my oncologist's nurse, Carol. She said Dr. J has seen the scan results and wanted me to know everything looked clear! So, good news!! I still have that mammo and mri to get through in April, then I will be really excited!
I really had no "scanxiety" this time. I kept waiting for it, assuming it would hit, but it never did. I am so thankful to God for giving me peace! He took away my fears, and took away the nausea that I used to get everytime I was on my way to Regions Hospital. Yes, He allowed me to go through 2 cancer diagnoses, but He has been right by my side through it all. I have learned so much about my Lord, and that's what really matters. As I like to say---it's not about me, it's all about GOD!
I'll check back in a few days, after meeting with my wonderful Dr. Jahagirdar!
Please say a prayer for my cousin Jim, as he lost his wife unexpectedly this weekend--very sad!
Tina
Monday, January 24, 2011
January 24th Update
Hey everyone! I haven't been posting much because there just isn't much to say! I am enjoying life, and giving myself time to heal.
I want to mention my sadness over the loss of a sister blogger. She passed away a few days ago after a long battle with stage 4 breast cancer. I knew she was getting worse, but there still seemed to be hope, so this was sort of sudden. She occasionally read my blog, and it is sad writing this one knowing she won't be reading it. We will miss you Daria! Please pray for her husband and family.
Last Thursday, the 20th, was one year since I finished the FOLFOX chemo for colon cancer. Coming up soon will be my 2 year "cancerversary". In about a month I'll have my CT scan to check for more cancer. The thought doesn't make me nervous yet, but we'll see what happens when the date gets closer! Even though I know God is with me, I still wouldn't like to hear there is more cancer!
As far as the breast cancer goes, I will have my next Herceptin infusion next Wed., Feb. 2nd. The infusions are every 3 weeks. I might have to have some labs done because of the bp med I'm taking, but I won't be seeing my onc at this appt. I'll see him next time to go over my CT and MUGA results.
I'm still thinking about whether or not I want to do reconstruction. I've been reading others' experiences, and there is a private website where you can look at pictures of reconstruction. I'm am so grateful to the women who have put their pictures and their stories there to help others. I would probably have to have some sort of "flap" surgery, because radiation affects the skin too much for implants. One of the flap procedures uses the muscle from your back and brings it around to the front. This sounds painful to me! I'm not sure I want to go through a major surgery and 6 week recovery again. We'll see... Any pros and cons from any readers that have gone through this(recon or not) please e-mail me!
I am LOVING my time off! I feel so guilty sometimes, then I remember all I've been through the past 2 years, and I don't feel so guilty anymore! Also, because of my neuropathy I can't work anyways, at least not until it warms up outside! I usually watch Brennan once or twice a week, I have time to IRON (something I always hated to do but mostly because I didn't have time! Rich was happy to have some of his shirts back!), I am helping out at church again ( I do copying and stuff for the Children's Pastor), AND I joined a women's Bible study that is on Thurs. mornings. It's a Beth Moore study called "Breaking Free". It's pretty intense, and helps you overcome anything that might be holding you captive. I have no idea what that might be right now, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to find out! God wanted me at this study for a reason. The study says that "A Christian is held captive by anything that hinders the abundant and effective Spirit-filled life God planned for her". I want that "abundant and effective Spirit-filled life" that God has planned for me! Rachel and Alyssa are doing the study too. Alyssa has also done other Beth Moore studies.
Speaking of Alyssa, she and Jaren are down in Cabo San Lucas on their mission trip right now. They will be building a classroom for the youth in the area and putting on a marriage seminar. She sent me an e-mail after their 1st day. It is warm and beautiful there and she saw some whales in the bay! They asked for prayer for sleep (apparently the bed and pillow are hard as rocks!), and for them not to have any stomach troubles or illness. Also, please pray for the lives they will be touching down there. This is a very poor area where the kids are often left alone during the day. There is lots of drug use also. Pray for the team to be strong in the Lord and the presence of the Holy Spirit to be with them.
Rachel is spending a lot of time trying to get all their paperwork done for the adoption. Many forms have had to be redone more than once. If everything is not PERFECT it has to be redone! They are hoping to be one of the first families called to go over there to adopt their son. Hopefully this will be in March or April!
Shonna is back at school and busy as ever. She works a few hours a week at a nearby library. She will be learning how to play the keyboard and has some sort of singing lessons too, I think. Also choir, theology, and required time in the prayer room. Here is a link to the prayer room. It's great to listen to during your own prayer time or Bible study time.
Well, that's all for today!
Love and blessings!
Tina
I want to mention my sadness over the loss of a sister blogger. She passed away a few days ago after a long battle with stage 4 breast cancer. I knew she was getting worse, but there still seemed to be hope, so this was sort of sudden. She occasionally read my blog, and it is sad writing this one knowing she won't be reading it. We will miss you Daria! Please pray for her husband and family.
Last Thursday, the 20th, was one year since I finished the FOLFOX chemo for colon cancer. Coming up soon will be my 2 year "cancerversary". In about a month I'll have my CT scan to check for more cancer. The thought doesn't make me nervous yet, but we'll see what happens when the date gets closer! Even though I know God is with me, I still wouldn't like to hear there is more cancer!
As far as the breast cancer goes, I will have my next Herceptin infusion next Wed., Feb. 2nd. The infusions are every 3 weeks. I might have to have some labs done because of the bp med I'm taking, but I won't be seeing my onc at this appt. I'll see him next time to go over my CT and MUGA results.
I'm still thinking about whether or not I want to do reconstruction. I've been reading others' experiences, and there is a private website where you can look at pictures of reconstruction. I'm am so grateful to the women who have put their pictures and their stories there to help others. I would probably have to have some sort of "flap" surgery, because radiation affects the skin too much for implants. One of the flap procedures uses the muscle from your back and brings it around to the front. This sounds painful to me! I'm not sure I want to go through a major surgery and 6 week recovery again. We'll see... Any pros and cons from any readers that have gone through this(recon or not) please e-mail me!
I am LOVING my time off! I feel so guilty sometimes, then I remember all I've been through the past 2 years, and I don't feel so guilty anymore! Also, because of my neuropathy I can't work anyways, at least not until it warms up outside! I usually watch Brennan once or twice a week, I have time to IRON (something I always hated to do but mostly because I didn't have time! Rich was happy to have some of his shirts back!), I am helping out at church again ( I do copying and stuff for the Children's Pastor), AND I joined a women's Bible study that is on Thurs. mornings. It's a Beth Moore study called "Breaking Free". It's pretty intense, and helps you overcome anything that might be holding you captive. I have no idea what that might be right now, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to find out! God wanted me at this study for a reason. The study says that "A Christian is held captive by anything that hinders the abundant and effective Spirit-filled life God planned for her". I want that "abundant and effective Spirit-filled life" that God has planned for me! Rachel and Alyssa are doing the study too. Alyssa has also done other Beth Moore studies.
Speaking of Alyssa, she and Jaren are down in Cabo San Lucas on their mission trip right now. They will be building a classroom for the youth in the area and putting on a marriage seminar. She sent me an e-mail after their 1st day. It is warm and beautiful there and she saw some whales in the bay! They asked for prayer for sleep (apparently the bed and pillow are hard as rocks!), and for them not to have any stomach troubles or illness. Also, please pray for the lives they will be touching down there. This is a very poor area where the kids are often left alone during the day. There is lots of drug use also. Pray for the team to be strong in the Lord and the presence of the Holy Spirit to be with them.
Rachel is spending a lot of time trying to get all their paperwork done for the adoption. Many forms have had to be redone more than once. If everything is not PERFECT it has to be redone! They are hoping to be one of the first families called to go over there to adopt their son. Hopefully this will be in March or April!
Shonna is back at school and busy as ever. She works a few hours a week at a nearby library. She will be learning how to play the keyboard and has some sort of singing lessons too, I think. Also choir, theology, and required time in the prayer room. Here is a link to the prayer room. It's great to listen to during your own prayer time or Bible study time.
Well, that's all for today!
Love and blessings!
Tina
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Enjoying Lazy Days
What a busy time last week was! Thursday all the kids (3 girls and 2 spouses, and Brennan!) were here making cookies. The girls get together here every year to make sugar cookies. We do it the easy way and buy the Pillsbury dough, then shape them, bake, and decorate. Decorating is the highlight. I make butter cream frosting, and we have lots of sprinkles and such. Alyssa, my mom, and I did a little shopping while Rachel was making the cookies. When we got home Rich and Jaren were on the roof clearing off snow. Alyssa was driving and when she saw her hubby up there she squealed and covered her eyes. She didn't like seeing him up there--I hate it when Rich goes up there! Next thing you know, Alyssa is up on the roof too! Lots of prayers were said by me! Jaren jumped off into the huge pile of snow on the ground, after helping Alyssa down the ladder, and Rich carefully slid/jumped off! After the cookies were done, we all ate pizza for dinner, then the kids headed home. At the end of the day I was very tired, but very happy! I am always amazed at how God has blessed me with such wonderful kids!
Friday (Christmas Eve), we all went to church together at 2pm. We didn't go to Bridgewood, as their times didn't fit our schedule. We went to our former church, North Heights, and got to see some of their Christmas production. It was nice visiting there as they have wonderful productions, music, decorations and such, but I don't miss it. Bridgewood is home now. After church we had dinner (I make a simple spaghetti dinner) then we opened some presents. Our tradition is the girls open their presents to each other, and Rich and I open our presents to each other. When the kids were really little, Rich and I would open our gifts to each other after the girls went to bed, by the lights of the tree.
Christmas day started off with the kids coming back about 10am, and then they opened their stockings, we had cinnamon rolls, and they we opened the rest of our gifts. My big gift this year was my new laptop, which I got about a week earlier. Love it!! I also got a Chronological Bible from Rich. I plan to read through the Old Testament again, and I thought this might make more sense to me. We'll see. All the gifts Rachel bought for us this year were items that supported orphans, or the families trying to adopt them. She gave me a pretty necklace. Brennan was the highlight of the day. He would help rip open a present now and then, but never really cared what the gift was! He was happy and silly, and fun to watch! The kids all dispersed about noon, then we met up again later at my brother's house for the family get-together. We finished the day around 7:30 or 8.
On Sunday church had only one service at 10, so no sleeping in then either. Rich had to be there a little early in case they needed him for ushering. Alyssa, Rachel and I went shopping after church for some after Christmas sales.
Rich has this whole week off, and we have been doing a lot of shopping. Using gift cards, and getting things we need at good sale prices. I'm finding that going to more than one store at a time is too much for me, unless we are traveling between stores and I get a bit of a break in the car. If I get too tired, Rich will drop me off at the door and pick me up again. Sometimes I just need to find a spot to sit for a bit, or wait in the car and let Rich run in by himself. After we get home (usually late afternoon) I'm pretty much done for the day!
The mornings have been especially nice. I've been sleeping in, and taking it slow, and enjoying the mornings. Rich has been taking it easy too--he needs that. I'm glad he's getting some downtime. We head out around lunch time, get a bite to eat, then hit a few stores.
I was thinking this morning how much I am enjoying this break. I've been doing chemo, then rads (every day for 33 days!), then when radiation was done I so busy with Christmas stuff! So Monday was the first day in a loooong time that I could really take it easy and just do fun stuff, or whatever I wanted! So free feeling! Finally!
I've been very happy lately (although sometimes I'm sure I just look tired!). Some people get depressed after they are all done. There is such a whirlwind of activity for so many months, then it just all stops. While going through treatment you don't always have time to really think about things. Then when it's all over, you have too much time...and think too much. It's hard to understand if you haven't been through it. If you know someone who is going through cancer treatment, don't expect them to bounce back to "normal" right away. They may never be back to the "normal" that you expect them to be. They will be different; changed. And it may take them awhile to move on. Be patient, and just be there for them. And never tell them to "get over it"!!! You might get punched!
Although I have a little different perspective on things, I totally understand what others go through. And I can not say I never feel down or will never get depressed. Right now I am just grateful for each day God gives me. My life is in His hands. None of us know how long we have. Why waste time wishing for this or that? Just count your blessings. Do you have a roof over your head? Heat? Clothes? Food? Family and/or friends? Then you are truly rich and blessed! Help those that don't have those things. And pray for them.
Speaking of those that don't have much, the country that Rachel and Ken are adopting from are NOT closing the adoptions! Our prayers were answered! Things can always change though, and we won't rest too easy until we have that little boy home with us.
Shonna and friends are down in KC at the Onething convention. She'll be back on Sat. Which is Alyssa's birthday. Tomorrow we are watching Brennan for a little while in the afternoon. It's been awhile since I actually babysat him. We have a lot of new toys for him to play with!
Next Monday Rich goes back to work and I will try to put together some sort of schedule for myself. I need to get back to reading God's word, exercise, and make a "to-do" list. There are so many things I want to do, I need to list and prioritize them, or they won't get done! There are things that have been put off for 2 YEARS! :)
On the medical front, I have my next MUGA (heart function) scan next Thursday. Hoping and praying my heart function has increased with the new med I'm on so I can continue getting Herceptin. I will see the doc the following Wed.(the 12th) to discuss the results and hopefully get my next Herceptin infusion.
Time for bed!
Good night and God bless!
Tina
Friday (Christmas Eve), we all went to church together at 2pm. We didn't go to Bridgewood, as their times didn't fit our schedule. We went to our former church, North Heights, and got to see some of their Christmas production. It was nice visiting there as they have wonderful productions, music, decorations and such, but I don't miss it. Bridgewood is home now. After church we had dinner (I make a simple spaghetti dinner) then we opened some presents. Our tradition is the girls open their presents to each other, and Rich and I open our presents to each other. When the kids were really little, Rich and I would open our gifts to each other after the girls went to bed, by the lights of the tree.
Christmas day started off with the kids coming back about 10am, and then they opened their stockings, we had cinnamon rolls, and they we opened the rest of our gifts. My big gift this year was my new laptop, which I got about a week earlier. Love it!! I also got a Chronological Bible from Rich. I plan to read through the Old Testament again, and I thought this might make more sense to me. We'll see. All the gifts Rachel bought for us this year were items that supported orphans, or the families trying to adopt them. She gave me a pretty necklace. Brennan was the highlight of the day. He would help rip open a present now and then, but never really cared what the gift was! He was happy and silly, and fun to watch! The kids all dispersed about noon, then we met up again later at my brother's house for the family get-together. We finished the day around 7:30 or 8.
On Sunday church had only one service at 10, so no sleeping in then either. Rich had to be there a little early in case they needed him for ushering. Alyssa, Rachel and I went shopping after church for some after Christmas sales.
Rich has this whole week off, and we have been doing a lot of shopping. Using gift cards, and getting things we need at good sale prices. I'm finding that going to more than one store at a time is too much for me, unless we are traveling between stores and I get a bit of a break in the car. If I get too tired, Rich will drop me off at the door and pick me up again. Sometimes I just need to find a spot to sit for a bit, or wait in the car and let Rich run in by himself. After we get home (usually late afternoon) I'm pretty much done for the day!
The mornings have been especially nice. I've been sleeping in, and taking it slow, and enjoying the mornings. Rich has been taking it easy too--he needs that. I'm glad he's getting some downtime. We head out around lunch time, get a bite to eat, then hit a few stores.
I was thinking this morning how much I am enjoying this break. I've been doing chemo, then rads (every day for 33 days!), then when radiation was done I so busy with Christmas stuff! So Monday was the first day in a loooong time that I could really take it easy and just do fun stuff, or whatever I wanted! So free feeling! Finally!
I've been very happy lately (although sometimes I'm sure I just look tired!). Some people get depressed after they are all done. There is such a whirlwind of activity for so many months, then it just all stops. While going through treatment you don't always have time to really think about things. Then when it's all over, you have too much time...and think too much. It's hard to understand if you haven't been through it. If you know someone who is going through cancer treatment, don't expect them to bounce back to "normal" right away. They may never be back to the "normal" that you expect them to be. They will be different; changed. And it may take them awhile to move on. Be patient, and just be there for them. And never tell them to "get over it"!!! You might get punched!
Although I have a little different perspective on things, I totally understand what others go through. And I can not say I never feel down or will never get depressed. Right now I am just grateful for each day God gives me. My life is in His hands. None of us know how long we have. Why waste time wishing for this or that? Just count your blessings. Do you have a roof over your head? Heat? Clothes? Food? Family and/or friends? Then you are truly rich and blessed! Help those that don't have those things. And pray for them.
Speaking of those that don't have much, the country that Rachel and Ken are adopting from are NOT closing the adoptions! Our prayers were answered! Things can always change though, and we won't rest too easy until we have that little boy home with us.
Shonna and friends are down in KC at the Onething convention. She'll be back on Sat. Which is Alyssa's birthday. Tomorrow we are watching Brennan for a little while in the afternoon. It's been awhile since I actually babysat him. We have a lot of new toys for him to play with!
Next Monday Rich goes back to work and I will try to put together some sort of schedule for myself. I need to get back to reading God's word, exercise, and make a "to-do" list. There are so many things I want to do, I need to list and prioritize them, or they won't get done! There are things that have been put off for 2 YEARS! :)
On the medical front, I have my next MUGA (heart function) scan next Thursday. Hoping and praying my heart function has increased with the new med I'm on so I can continue getting Herceptin. I will see the doc the following Wed.(the 12th) to discuss the results and hopefully get my next Herceptin infusion.
Time for bed!
Good night and God bless!
Tina
Friday, June 25, 2010
Thoughts and Stuff
Yeah, I really need to work on my blog titles! I'll try to do better :). Its just something I don't want to waste a lot of time on, I guess.
So, lots of messages from God today! Do you know what I thought about a few minutes ago??? Are you ready for this??? The thought passed through my head, with a chuckle, that I need to stay sick long enough to learn all God has to teach me. As soon as I had the thought, I back-tracked and went, "wait a minute God, don't me too seriously on that!!" Whew! Thankfully my God is an all-knowing God and He knows what I mean! I wish I could be HEALTHY and learn all these same lessons, but I have to say, that when the business of life takes over, God sometimes get pushed out of the way. Sad, but true. I'm really praying that He helps me find a way to balance this. When I was back working, I was so disappointed that I only had energy for work. I was beat by the time I got home. I love my job, but I love my life outside of work more. Pray for me on this, ok? I REALLY want to know what God's will is for my life.
Today my e-mail devotional was about spiritual gifts. I had to laugh because the woman writing it, LeeAnn Rice, was disappointed when she took a spiritual gifts test. She didn't feel that any of her gifts were the "important" ones. I felt the same way! Rich and I recently took a class at church on spiritual gifts and took an online test. My top ones were faith, exhortation, encouragement, mercy, and music. What the heck can a person do with that? I wanted something concrete-->DO THIS TO SERVE GOD. I was happy to find out (from my pastor) that although I don't have any musical ability, I minister to God through my personal worship. I often have a song of praise going through my head, and when I'm not sure where to start when praying, I just start singing to God. I wish I could tell you that I went on to discover what I can do with my other gifts, but I'm still working on that--but I do know that God can use me, whatever gifts I might have, and ALL gifts are important! "Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms." 1 Peter 4:10 (NIV) Note the word "whatever"!
I also learned today from Pastor Tom's blog (see link on sidebar), that "ordinary Christianity" is an oxymoron. I agree! All Christians are "EXTRA ordinary" We are called to live "EXTRAordinary" lives. I better get on that! I hope I can keep that word at the forefront of my mind, and remember it in everything I do.
Ok, a health report: I have been feeling REALLY good! I have had plenty of energy the last few days, and even have been getting up early (6:30 today!). Today I will think about what I want/need to get done before chemo on Monday. Oh--just thought of something. I think today is payday--so I should pay bills. Next week I won't care!
Yesterday I got out a bit and went shopping. I need more shirts that have patterns on them. Solid color shirts show any "uneveness" I might have, if ya know what I mean! Patterns make it harder to tell. It felt good to be out shopping. Last time I went was a few days before my mastectomy and I ended up in tears because I thought I'd never be able to wear cute stuff again. Yesterday I was happy with how everything looked! And then I got a yummy Wild Berry Smoothie from Caribou!
Today I'm going to have lunch with a good friend. I wanted to take her out as a little thank you for all her help with Shonna's party.
Looking at my calendar I see that its been 3 years today since Rich's craniotomy. I'm happy to report that any neurological issues he had before, seem to have resolved themselves. I hope he never has to go through anything like that again! That is a scary surgery!
Well, better get going on that to-do list!
Have a great weekend!
Tina
So, lots of messages from God today! Do you know what I thought about a few minutes ago??? Are you ready for this??? The thought passed through my head, with a chuckle, that I need to stay sick long enough to learn all God has to teach me. As soon as I had the thought, I back-tracked and went, "wait a minute God, don't me too seriously on that!!" Whew! Thankfully my God is an all-knowing God and He knows what I mean! I wish I could be HEALTHY and learn all these same lessons, but I have to say, that when the business of life takes over, God sometimes get pushed out of the way. Sad, but true. I'm really praying that He helps me find a way to balance this. When I was back working, I was so disappointed that I only had energy for work. I was beat by the time I got home. I love my job, but I love my life outside of work more. Pray for me on this, ok? I REALLY want to know what God's will is for my life.
Today my e-mail devotional was about spiritual gifts. I had to laugh because the woman writing it, LeeAnn Rice, was disappointed when she took a spiritual gifts test. She didn't feel that any of her gifts were the "important" ones. I felt the same way! Rich and I recently took a class at church on spiritual gifts and took an online test. My top ones were faith, exhortation, encouragement, mercy, and music. What the heck can a person do with that? I wanted something concrete-->DO THIS TO SERVE GOD. I was happy to find out (from my pastor) that although I don't have any musical ability, I minister to God through my personal worship. I often have a song of praise going through my head, and when I'm not sure where to start when praying, I just start singing to God. I wish I could tell you that I went on to discover what I can do with my other gifts, but I'm still working on that--but I do know that God can use me, whatever gifts I might have, and ALL gifts are important! "Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms." 1 Peter 4:10 (NIV) Note the word "whatever"!
I also learned today from Pastor Tom's blog (see link on sidebar), that "ordinary Christianity" is an oxymoron. I agree! All Christians are "EXTRA ordinary" We are called to live "EXTRAordinary" lives. I better get on that! I hope I can keep that word at the forefront of my mind, and remember it in everything I do.
Ok, a health report: I have been feeling REALLY good! I have had plenty of energy the last few days, and even have been getting up early (6:30 today!). Today I will think about what I want/need to get done before chemo on Monday. Oh--just thought of something. I think today is payday--so I should pay bills. Next week I won't care!
Yesterday I got out a bit and went shopping. I need more shirts that have patterns on them. Solid color shirts show any "uneveness" I might have, if ya know what I mean! Patterns make it harder to tell. It felt good to be out shopping. Last time I went was a few days before my mastectomy and I ended up in tears because I thought I'd never be able to wear cute stuff again. Yesterday I was happy with how everything looked! And then I got a yummy Wild Berry Smoothie from Caribou!
Today I'm going to have lunch with a good friend. I wanted to take her out as a little thank you for all her help with Shonna's party.
Looking at my calendar I see that its been 3 years today since Rich's craniotomy. I'm happy to report that any neurological issues he had before, seem to have resolved themselves. I hope he never has to go through anything like that again! That is a scary surgery!
Well, better get going on that to-do list!
Have a great weekend!
Tina
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Trying to be a Mudder
I think I am doing well, all things considered. I am still taking pain meds, and they are keeping the pain under control. There is more pain this time than there was after my lumpectomy. Its a larger area of my chest that was affected. Most people don't realize that the breast tissue goes up near the collarbone. I have a big dip in my chest near there where tissue was removed. The surgeon left some tissue behind, to help with reconstruction, so the area looks a little worse--not the nice neat scar some would expect. If I choose not to have reconstruction, I will have the extra stuff removed.
Emotionally I am doing well too, at least so far. There is a lot to deal with right now, but I'm not overwhelmed or upset. I'm really taking it easy and giving myself time to get used to all of this. I have a lot to do the next few weeks, but for a few days I'm just relaxing. Today I plan on keeping my mind on some Bible verses, and just keep God in my thoughts as I go about my day.
You may have noticed I've been playing with my blog a little. I've added labels and some tabs at the top. Hopefully this will make it easier to navigate the blog.
The former Senior Pastor at our church, Tom Stuart, has a wonderful blog. There is a link to it on my side bar. The other day he blogged about "Mudders". A Mudder is someone who overcomes what life throws at them--like a horse that performs well in muddy, adverse conditions. Here is a line from Tom's blog about spiritual mudders:" ...if you’re a child of God, born of the Spirit through faith in Jesus Christ, you’ve got “mudder” in your spiritual genes. That makes you more than a conqueror through Him who loves you; and an overcomer in anything life throws at you." Tom mentioned me in his blog as a spiritual mudder--I was honored to be mentioned there! I have never felt like an "overcomer". It's not something that comes naturally to me, but it speaks to the power of God, and the miraculous things He can do in a person's life. Any challenge you are facing, no matter how overwhelming, God can turn you into a "Mudder". You too can overcome and even CONQUER any troubles you have on this earth. God is truly amazing and His love for us is deeper and wider than anything we can imagine. Just talk to Him; He'll reveal Himself to you, and you'll be amazed too!
I'd love to hear from some of you that are reading my blog! You can comment on my blog, or e-mail me if you want your comments to be private. If there is ANYTHING I can do to help you or someone else get through a cancer diagnosis and treatment, please let me know. And, of course, I always welcome insight and advice from others who have been through what I'm going through now!
Thanks for checking in today!
Love and blessings!
Tina
Emotionally I am doing well too, at least so far. There is a lot to deal with right now, but I'm not overwhelmed or upset. I'm really taking it easy and giving myself time to get used to all of this. I have a lot to do the next few weeks, but for a few days I'm just relaxing. Today I plan on keeping my mind on some Bible verses, and just keep God in my thoughts as I go about my day.
You may have noticed I've been playing with my blog a little. I've added labels and some tabs at the top. Hopefully this will make it easier to navigate the blog.
The former Senior Pastor at our church, Tom Stuart, has a wonderful blog. There is a link to it on my side bar. The other day he blogged about "Mudders". A Mudder is someone who overcomes what life throws at them--like a horse that performs well in muddy, adverse conditions. Here is a line from Tom's blog about spiritual mudders:" ...if you’re a child of God, born of the Spirit through faith in Jesus Christ, you’ve got “mudder” in your spiritual genes. That makes you more than a conqueror through Him who loves you; and an overcomer in anything life throws at you." Tom mentioned me in his blog as a spiritual mudder--I was honored to be mentioned there! I have never felt like an "overcomer". It's not something that comes naturally to me, but it speaks to the power of God, and the miraculous things He can do in a person's life. Any challenge you are facing, no matter how overwhelming, God can turn you into a "Mudder". You too can overcome and even CONQUER any troubles you have on this earth. God is truly amazing and His love for us is deeper and wider than anything we can imagine. Just talk to Him; He'll reveal Himself to you, and you'll be amazed too!
I'd love to hear from some of you that are reading my blog! You can comment on my blog, or e-mail me if you want your comments to be private. If there is ANYTHING I can do to help you or someone else get through a cancer diagnosis and treatment, please let me know. And, of course, I always welcome insight and advice from others who have been through what I'm going through now!
Thanks for checking in today!
Love and blessings!
Tina
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Prayer (and laughter!) is a Wonderful Thing
First I want to say that I am still chuckling over a blog I just read. "Whitestone" is bald from chemo and is visiting her daughter (here in MN). She decided to try some shampoo her daughter had for "curly" hair(!). She reported that, no, it didn't make her bald head curly--it was just wishful thinking! She signed off as "still bald, but not curly". For some reason that last line really made me laugh out loud! Still does! Thank you, my dear, for your wonderful sense of humor!
Today at church we had a pastor(?) from the International House of Prayer in KC (IHOP) visiting. He is a prophetic minister and has the gift of healing. So after the service my family and I went up to get prayer for my cancer. This week has been really stressful and difficult for me, and I just don't know what to think or how to react to all the bad news I've gotten. I've been wondering how much worse it can get, and I'm afraid to have all my scans next week. I REALLY want to continue to praise God through all of this, and draw closer to Him. I'm praying that I will be able to hear His voice--I want that soooo badly! And I hope others will see my faith and theirs will be strengthened--that would make all of this worthwhile. But the important thing is that GOD'S will is done--not mine.
Anyway, the prayer with Graeme Walsh was really good, and freeing. I just felt a big release--of what I don't know--healing? tension? stress? Doesn't matter. It felt good.
One of the most important sermons I've ever heard was one of the ones during the "Fearless Living" series our church did recently (you can listen online at www.bridgewoodcc.org). God really wants us to rely on Him--totally and completely. That is what I am learning through all this. It is so hard to FULLY comprehend what that means. But every now and then I catch little glimpses of it, and for a moment I "get it", but when I try to grasp onto it, it disappears like smoke. But I am encouraged that God is giving me these little moments of understanding. There is just so much interference I have to work through. At times like this I actually get excited to be going through this if it means walking closer with God.
The last time through chemo He really showed me that He was there for me and hearing the prayers of everyone for me. That helped me through my lowest point. I fully expect more from God this time. This is a season I have to go through, but I don't have to go through it alone. And I hope my husband and daughters know that God is with them too, helping them through this. Don't be afraid to pray for yourselves, thinking that its all about me. You are all with me in this, and you need to be lifted up in prayer too. God will help you through, no matter what happens to me.
Ok, I went from laughing to crying in a matter of a few minutes! Such is my life right now! :) This is going to be quite a journey! Let's be excited that God loves us so much that He DESIRES us to be closer to Him. We must go through the fires to be refined into pure gold; our branches must be pruned so that we can bear fruit. (ok, I hope I didn't mess those up! lol! I'm NOT a preacher!).
"Praise the Lord, oh my soul, all that is within me praise His holy name!" Psalm 103:1
Love to all!
Tina
Today at church we had a pastor(?) from the International House of Prayer in KC (IHOP) visiting. He is a prophetic minister and has the gift of healing. So after the service my family and I went up to get prayer for my cancer. This week has been really stressful and difficult for me, and I just don't know what to think or how to react to all the bad news I've gotten. I've been wondering how much worse it can get, and I'm afraid to have all my scans next week. I REALLY want to continue to praise God through all of this, and draw closer to Him. I'm praying that I will be able to hear His voice--I want that soooo badly! And I hope others will see my faith and theirs will be strengthened--that would make all of this worthwhile. But the important thing is that GOD'S will is done--not mine.
Anyway, the prayer with Graeme Walsh was really good, and freeing. I just felt a big release--of what I don't know--healing? tension? stress? Doesn't matter. It felt good.
One of the most important sermons I've ever heard was one of the ones during the "Fearless Living" series our church did recently (you can listen online at www.bridgewoodcc.org). God really wants us to rely on Him--totally and completely. That is what I am learning through all this. It is so hard to FULLY comprehend what that means. But every now and then I catch little glimpses of it, and for a moment I "get it", but when I try to grasp onto it, it disappears like smoke. But I am encouraged that God is giving me these little moments of understanding. There is just so much interference I have to work through. At times like this I actually get excited to be going through this if it means walking closer with God.
The last time through chemo He really showed me that He was there for me and hearing the prayers of everyone for me. That helped me through my lowest point. I fully expect more from God this time. This is a season I have to go through, but I don't have to go through it alone. And I hope my husband and daughters know that God is with them too, helping them through this. Don't be afraid to pray for yourselves, thinking that its all about me. You are all with me in this, and you need to be lifted up in prayer too. God will help you through, no matter what happens to me.
Ok, I went from laughing to crying in a matter of a few minutes! Such is my life right now! :) This is going to be quite a journey! Let's be excited that God loves us so much that He DESIRES us to be closer to Him. We must go through the fires to be refined into pure gold; our branches must be pruned so that we can bear fruit. (ok, I hope I didn't mess those up! lol! I'm NOT a preacher!).
"Praise the Lord, oh my soul, all that is within me praise His holy name!" Psalm 103:1
Love to all!
Tina
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Biopsy Results!
Well, got the news today, and its not good. I do have breast cancer. Its DCIS, with an "area of micro-invasive ductal carcinoma". What that means is that its mostly non-invasive, but part of it is invasive. That means it can spread. My primary doc thinks we probably found it early enough. She gave me the name of a surgeon to call.
Before I called a surgeon, I wanted to check in with my oncologist to see what he had to say. He is out of the office this week, but his nurse gave me the # for Regions Breast Care Center--which is right across the hall from my onc. They have 3 surgeons there, so I made an appt. with one of them for next Thursday. I had an appt. to get my port flushed next Friday, but I changed that to right before my surgeon's appt., so I can do it all in one visit.
I'm guessing I will have to have a lumpectomy, and maybe radiation. Hopefully that's it. You'd think all the chemo I just had would have taken care of this too--but each cancer is very different.
So, isn't life fun? I am feeling very sarcastic, annoyed, and sometimes even a little humorous, but not afraid. I thought it was a little funny that I now can sport blue and pink ribbons--I love those 2 colors together! I guess the "C" word doesn't scare me so much anymore. God is still good (its impossible for Him to be anything else!), and He will help me through this too. Our sermon series at church has been about "Fearless Living", and I've decided to really put my trust in God and not be afraid! Life isn't about me, or my happiness and comfort, its about God, and showing Him to others and giving Him glory no matter what happens.
So, keep me in your prayers, but don't worry about me. :)
Love to all,
Tina
Before I called a surgeon, I wanted to check in with my oncologist to see what he had to say. He is out of the office this week, but his nurse gave me the # for Regions Breast Care Center--which is right across the hall from my onc. They have 3 surgeons there, so I made an appt. with one of them for next Thursday. I had an appt. to get my port flushed next Friday, but I changed that to right before my surgeon's appt., so I can do it all in one visit.
I'm guessing I will have to have a lumpectomy, and maybe radiation. Hopefully that's it. You'd think all the chemo I just had would have taken care of this too--but each cancer is very different.
So, isn't life fun? I am feeling very sarcastic, annoyed, and sometimes even a little humorous, but not afraid. I thought it was a little funny that I now can sport blue and pink ribbons--I love those 2 colors together! I guess the "C" word doesn't scare me so much anymore. God is still good (its impossible for Him to be anything else!), and He will help me through this too. Our sermon series at church has been about "Fearless Living", and I've decided to really put my trust in God and not be afraid! Life isn't about me, or my happiness and comfort, its about God, and showing Him to others and giving Him glory no matter what happens.
So, keep me in your prayers, but don't worry about me. :)
Love to all,
Tina
Friday, February 26, 2010
Well, this has been my last week off before I go back to work. It's been a busy couple of weeks! Looking at my calendar there is something written on almost everyday. Today was the first day in awhile that I didn't have anything planned. So I did laundry! And went out to lunch with Alyssa and Shonna--won't be able to do that for awhile!
Last Sunday my friend Pam wanted to get the elders of the church to pray for me. So after the service she tracked a few down and the senior pastor, Tom, anointed my head with oil and they prayed for me. It felt so awesome! I really have nothing to fear--God is watching over me, and He loves me and cares for me. I need to put on the full armor of God and stand strong against Satan!
Today I talked to my Primary doctor and she will set up the biopsy for the calcifications in my left breast. I told her I either want to do it during Spring Break (the end of March), or wait until school is out in June. She thought it best if I get it done during Spring Break. She didn't think it was a good idea to wait so long. So, I guess that's what I'll do! I just don't want to miss anymore work than I have to.
Next week I only work 3 days. We have Friday off so I scheduled my colonoscopy for then, but I need to take the day before (Thurs.) off to prep. Weird prep this time. Instead of just drinking the large jug of "go-litely" stuff, I have to mix Miralax with Gatorade, take 2 dulcolax pills, and drink some other stuff 4 hours before the test (which means I have to get up at 5am, because my test is at 9:15!). Sounds alot more complicated!
Really tired tonight. Not sure why--I don't think I slept too well last night. My mind was busy thinking about going back to work.
Brennan is cute as ever and getting big! I think he's over 16 pounds now. He's 5 months old today. He's getting strong. I've had the chance to babysit him a few times the last 2 weeks. That's the worst part about going back to work--now I won't be able to watch him for Rachel if she needs me during the day. Shonna's happy tho--she figures she'll get him more often now!
Alyssa and Jaren are doing well. He's back working as the CSO at our local police station. Alyssa had a bridal shower at Jaren's Godmother's house on Sat. It was very nice, and she got lots of great gifts.
Hope all is well with everyone!
Love,
Tina
Last Sunday my friend Pam wanted to get the elders of the church to pray for me. So after the service she tracked a few down and the senior pastor, Tom, anointed my head with oil and they prayed for me. It felt so awesome! I really have nothing to fear--God is watching over me, and He loves me and cares for me. I need to put on the full armor of God and stand strong against Satan!
Today I talked to my Primary doctor and she will set up the biopsy for the calcifications in my left breast. I told her I either want to do it during Spring Break (the end of March), or wait until school is out in June. She thought it best if I get it done during Spring Break. She didn't think it was a good idea to wait so long. So, I guess that's what I'll do! I just don't want to miss anymore work than I have to.
Next week I only work 3 days. We have Friday off so I scheduled my colonoscopy for then, but I need to take the day before (Thurs.) off to prep. Weird prep this time. Instead of just drinking the large jug of "go-litely" stuff, I have to mix Miralax with Gatorade, take 2 dulcolax pills, and drink some other stuff 4 hours before the test (which means I have to get up at 5am, because my test is at 9:15!). Sounds alot more complicated!
Really tired tonight. Not sure why--I don't think I slept too well last night. My mind was busy thinking about going back to work.
Brennan is cute as ever and getting big! I think he's over 16 pounds now. He's 5 months old today. He's getting strong. I've had the chance to babysit him a few times the last 2 weeks. That's the worst part about going back to work--now I won't be able to watch him for Rachel if she needs me during the day. Shonna's happy tho--she figures she'll get him more often now!
Alyssa and Jaren are doing well. He's back working as the CSO at our local police station. Alyssa had a bridal shower at Jaren's Godmother's house on Sat. It was very nice, and she got lots of great gifts.
Hope all is well with everyone!
Love,
Tina
Friday, February 19, 2010
Nerves and Nausea
Today I had to go to the Cancer Care Center to get my port flushed. I remembered to put the Emla cream on my port (numbs the area so the needle doesn't hurt so much), and I remembered to bring the treats we had bought (if anyone still wants to donate treats, we'll be going back in a month). Before I went out the door I felt like I was forgetting something. Do I need my scarf to protect my throat from the cold? No. Do I need my bag with books and snacks? No. I better drink cold water now because I won't be able to later. Oh, wait, yes I will still be able to have cold stuff because I'm NOT getting chemo!!!
My stomach started tightening up with all these thoughts. I just kept taking deep breaths, and reminded myself that I'm done with the bad stuff. I started feeling nauseous as soon as I left the house. I brought my Ativan with, just in case, but didn't want to take anything because I figured since I wasn't getting chemo, the nausea wouldn't last long. (3 hours later my stomach still feels a little yucky!)
It felt so weird being back there. My nurse, Andrea, was there, but she wasn't the one flushing my port. But she did come over to see new pics of Brennan, and to see how I was doing. That's the good part about going in--the nurses are so nice! Rich went with me, even tho I assured him I would be fine going by myself. But I'm always glad to have him there with me!
While I was there I asked my oncologist's nurse to ask him what he thinks about the mammogram report. She talked to him then came back to the infusion room to tell me what he said. Basically, he agreed with the radiologist and I should go ahead and get a "stereotactic" biopsy. I'll have to look that word up--but from what the radiologist said, its a thin needle that will take some of the calcifications out so they can be biopsied (sp?). He said it doesn't hurt. The nurse gave me a copy of the report, and it says that one group of calcifications looks like it may be DCIS (a non-invasive type of breast cancer).
DCIS is a cancer that doesn't spread, and doesn't grow very fast. The radiologist said if I left it for a few years, it may become a lump. So its not life-threatening. The worst part about it is I will be at higher risk for other types of breast cancer. I'm still annoyed at the whole thing, but not worried. :)
I hope that anyone reading this who has cancer, or is going through any other deep valley, realizes they don't have to go through it alone. God is there to hold you and carry you, all you have to do is ask! On this earth we will have troubles, but if we believe in God and His son Jesus, we can spend eternity with them, where there is no sickness, no pain, and no tears. That is so amazing to think about! God is so good!
Love you all!
Tina
My stomach started tightening up with all these thoughts. I just kept taking deep breaths, and reminded myself that I'm done with the bad stuff. I started feeling nauseous as soon as I left the house. I brought my Ativan with, just in case, but didn't want to take anything because I figured since I wasn't getting chemo, the nausea wouldn't last long. (3 hours later my stomach still feels a little yucky!)
It felt so weird being back there. My nurse, Andrea, was there, but she wasn't the one flushing my port. But she did come over to see new pics of Brennan, and to see how I was doing. That's the good part about going in--the nurses are so nice! Rich went with me, even tho I assured him I would be fine going by myself. But I'm always glad to have him there with me!
While I was there I asked my oncologist's nurse to ask him what he thinks about the mammogram report. She talked to him then came back to the infusion room to tell me what he said. Basically, he agreed with the radiologist and I should go ahead and get a "stereotactic" biopsy. I'll have to look that word up--but from what the radiologist said, its a thin needle that will take some of the calcifications out so they can be biopsied (sp?). He said it doesn't hurt. The nurse gave me a copy of the report, and it says that one group of calcifications looks like it may be DCIS (a non-invasive type of breast cancer).
DCIS is a cancer that doesn't spread, and doesn't grow very fast. The radiologist said if I left it for a few years, it may become a lump. So its not life-threatening. The worst part about it is I will be at higher risk for other types of breast cancer. I'm still annoyed at the whole thing, but not worried. :)
I hope that anyone reading this who has cancer, or is going through any other deep valley, realizes they don't have to go through it alone. God is there to hold you and carry you, all you have to do is ask! On this earth we will have troubles, but if we believe in God and His son Jesus, we can spend eternity with them, where there is no sickness, no pain, and no tears. That is so amazing to think about! God is so good!
Love you all!
Tina
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
2nd Mammogram
I went in this afternoon for more pictures of my left breast. The radiologist saw some calcifications, and needed a different view and higher magnification to see them better. He doesn't know if they are pre-cancerous or not. I will have to have pieces of them removed and looked at. He said there is no hurry, they are contained in the duct and won't spread anywhere. He said something about DCIS, which is a type of cancer that is non-invasive. So if it were cancer, that's what it would be. Even though its non-invasive (doesn't spread), once you've had it you have a higher risk of getting DCIS again, or an invasive type of cancer.
I'm having the report sent to my oncologist, as well as my primary doc. I go in Friday to the cancer center to get my port flushed, and I'm thinking about calling tomorrow to see if my onc. will have time to see me on Friday. I'll feel better after talking to him. Not that I'm really worried right now, but I just trust his judgement and I want him to tell me what I should do.
So, not what I needed right now, but not too bad either. I'm not worried, just annoyed! I read in 2 Chronicles how the Lord was unhappy with Asa (King of Judah) for relying on other Kings to help fight Judah's battles and relying on physicians to heal him. God wanted Asa to rely on HIM, as Asa had been for many years prior to this. It was a good message for me. Doesn't mean I shouldn't see doctors and let them do their thing, but I need to rely on God, and trust that HE is in control. Whatever happens to me is His will, and He is ALWAYS good!
Thanks for checking in!
Love and Blessings!
Tina
I'm having the report sent to my oncologist, as well as my primary doc. I go in Friday to the cancer center to get my port flushed, and I'm thinking about calling tomorrow to see if my onc. will have time to see me on Friday. I'll feel better after talking to him. Not that I'm really worried right now, but I just trust his judgement and I want him to tell me what I should do.
So, not what I needed right now, but not too bad either. I'm not worried, just annoyed! I read in 2 Chronicles how the Lord was unhappy with Asa (King of Judah) for relying on other Kings to help fight Judah's battles and relying on physicians to heal him. God wanted Asa to rely on HIM, as Asa had been for many years prior to this. It was a good message for me. Doesn't mean I shouldn't see doctors and let them do their thing, but I need to rely on God, and trust that HE is in control. Whatever happens to me is His will, and He is ALWAYS good!
Thanks for checking in!
Love and Blessings!
Tina
Monday, February 1, 2010
"Fear Not"
Our church is starting a new sermon series, called "Fearless Living". Yesterday I learned that the words "fear not" are in the Bible 366 times! I guess maybe I should pay attention, because its apparently important to God that we hear those words! I jokingly said after the service that I should have heard that message a year ago--when I was diagnosed with cancer. But, really, God has given me a tremendous peace and an almost child-like joy in everyday things through this whole ordeal. I am so grateful. Over the years I have had a hard time believing that I'm important enough to God for Him to pay much attention to me--I mean there are wars and disasters, and other things going on that are much more important than li'l ole me, right? WRONG! Each one of us is God's top priority! If He knows how many hairs are on my head, I can believe that He knows ALL my needs!
I was reminded yesterday that God is bigger than ANY problem I face, including the dreaded cancer. Therefore, I don't need to fear ANYTHING--EVER!!! I hope I remember this when it comes time to have a colonoscopy, or especially a CT scan. What will I do if they find more cancer? I will do my best to live out my faith, and trust in HIM. I really feel like my cancer is gone, but I can't see into the future and know what will happen. I just know that no matter what, God will carry me through.
I often get tears in my eyes during worship at church, and yesterday, during one song, I almost lost it. The name of the song is "Came to My Rescue", and the words "I called, You answered, and You came to my rescue" really hit me. That's exactly what happened when I heard that I had cancer. He came to my rescue--isn't that awesome?? You know what? WHATEVER struggle you face right now, if you call out to the Almighty God, He'll come to YOUR rescue too!!
For those of you who have different beliefs, and just come to this blog to hear about cancer related things, I hope I didn't turn you off. For me, God is a BIG part of this walk with cancer, so I can't NOT talk about Him, and all He's done for me.
Time to make supper!
Talk to ya all soon!
Love,
Tina
I was reminded yesterday that God is bigger than ANY problem I face, including the dreaded cancer. Therefore, I don't need to fear ANYTHING--EVER!!! I hope I remember this when it comes time to have a colonoscopy, or especially a CT scan. What will I do if they find more cancer? I will do my best to live out my faith, and trust in HIM. I really feel like my cancer is gone, but I can't see into the future and know what will happen. I just know that no matter what, God will carry me through.
I often get tears in my eyes during worship at church, and yesterday, during one song, I almost lost it. The name of the song is "Came to My Rescue", and the words "I called, You answered, and You came to my rescue" really hit me. That's exactly what happened when I heard that I had cancer. He came to my rescue--isn't that awesome?? You know what? WHATEVER struggle you face right now, if you call out to the Almighty God, He'll come to YOUR rescue too!!
For those of you who have different beliefs, and just come to this blog to hear about cancer related things, I hope I didn't turn you off. For me, God is a BIG part of this walk with cancer, so I can't NOT talk about Him, and all He's done for me.
Time to make supper!
Talk to ya all soon!
Love,
Tina
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